Note – I’m not talking bodybuilding – or boobybuilding, what have you – which a lot mistakenly equate with fitness. It’s not.
I’m talking “everyday fitness” which a lot of coaches promote.
And you’ll see most of them, without exception – chase the money and promote the gym.
I’ll never forget the day I casually once walked into a gym in China asking if they wanted fitness trainers. Not that I was looking. I was trying to while some time away before work and was curious to see what those infamous gyms looked like now (had been years since I set foot in one).
Well, the usual. Chrome and fern, stupid machines, massive weights (not bad if lifted right but sitting on your fanny to lift weights is not the right way, trust me – neither is lying on your damn back) – and of course “a yoga room” tucked away sonewhere.
Guy looked at me and said “sorry, we need strong people”
Given I had given him the Gorilla grip a while back which he complained about it seemed odd he would say that or maybe NOT given how idiots in general think.
“We don’t want Crossfitters”
I don’t do CrossFit, I began. But it was pointless as this loon pointed towards a picture of a grotesquely inflated Ronnie Coleman (yes, he’s made his way into Chinese gyms) – and said something in Chinese I didn’t get.
“Huh” I asked.
Apparently dude was saying Ronnie in Chinese.
“That what our client pay for”, he said, while wistfully looking at my lean and toned midsection.
Things have not changed, I laughed as I left. They have only gotten WORSE.
This morning as I saw a female coach on Twitter grunting her way through massive weights on the lat pulldown – ugh.
No pull-ups promoted to “get in shape”.
Let me ask you, beyond injury, what fucking purpose does the lat pull down serve beyond bodybuilding?
How functional is it?
How often do you sit on your fanny in real life and isolate the lats that way?
More so, let’s leave functional out of the equation.
Let’s talk “lose weight”. Most sign up for personal coaching for just that no?
How much weight has anyone ever lost on the lat fuckin pulldown ?
I thought so. . .if anything, people become more fat, blubbery and bloated under the illusion of “muscle burns fat”. (hint – in and as of itself, no. Exercise does. Sitting on your fanny in a comfortable padded seat ain’t exercise.)
What strength does it build? Again. Folks that can do a whale on the bloody pulldown – shockingly weak grip, legs, core, the list goes on and on and on ….
Even the bench press, by no means a “good” exercise to promote is far fucking better than the bloody pull-down.
These coaches aren’t idiots. Everyone “knows” pull-ups are the real deal. Certainly everyone wants to do pull-ups. Get the x shape.
Yet, they sit on their fanny while hoping to do pull-ups – why?
Most coaches respond with “because the pull-up is too tough for most people, even strong people”.
That’s not the full answer or even an accurate answer.
The accurate answer is this – it points out weaknesses which most want to HIDE – out – brutally in a “take no prisoners” “no escape” manner.
You can be a monster on the bench and lat pulldown – even overhead standing presses with barbells (which is a great exercise btw) – but be a complete flop show at even one slow steady pull-up. . .
More than lack of real world functional strength though, what PISSES most people off? When you stare at their expanding bellies and call them FAT. (and if the person doing the pointing out is a lard assian (no, not “asian”) themselves, then they’re even more of a non doer and complete fuckin idiot).
And if you are FAT, have excess flab around the midsection, the pull-up will expose it brutally. Even more so than with table pushups…
People are too scared to piss off paying or potential customers. (I’m not – I’ve built entire profitable businesses by doing just that – caveat – because it’s truly warranted)
And so most fitness coaches wouldn’t dare call their fat clients out for what they are – FAT.
I’m the polar reverse. I have said it before.
If it don’t hurt, it won’t work long term or at all. Period.
Emotion is the baseline or even starting point of any fuckin accomplishment. Period.
You have to WANT it. Bad. Often times what is thought of as negative “horrible fellow” is what’s needed, tough love gets the job DONE.
Most so called fucking coaches aren’t fit themselves to begin with. 95 percent of them can’t do two pull-ups in proper form.
They’ll molly coddle, hand hold, say all the soft nice things. They’ll take the money and run basically. Six months later the client is no better off on regards he or she should be. And they’ll either “think they are” if the coach has marketed right or they’ll complain about personal coaching in general…
Pathetic state of affairs.
Let me fucking ask you, pal.
How “tough” is it ? Most people pooh pooh at dead hangs. “Oh, so easy”
In the same breath they say it’s too tough.
What the hezey fella.
Be fucking rational.
Dead hangs done right are how you get on the royal road to pull-ups as well as pushups done right.
How tough is a ONE SECOND dead hang?
Or, one pushup done right?
Or, working up to either.
If you say too tough or some other nonsense to the above, then you’re a wanker whose most interested in Jassy style pink dumbbells “get shoulders massaged after each set” – more interested in wasting time shooting the bull at the gym and ogling babes or guys as the case might be. Period.
Gyms these days (old school pre 1950- now that was the real deal!) equate to BS socialization, much like docile – not a Tai Po – media.
By all means indugle if you so prefer, choose to – but it ain’t fitness. Not by a long darn shot.
And your trainer is probably female which is why you if you’re a guy signed up in the first place so you can ogle her or find an excuse to talk to a woman in your own pathetic life.
Be honest folks.
Get the fuck real.
Any fitness coach that promotes the lat pulldown as a means of everyday fitness is a complete cheat – and even more so if a fucking idiot – that you should avoid like the motherfuckin plague if you’re really serious about fitness.
And thats that.
My books on pull-ups are a must grab –
Or just the compilation if you so choose.
PS – I recently put out a great and politically incorrect manual on TIPS on pull-ups. As with the grip tips, this is NOT included in the compilation and never will be. It stands on its own . They both do. Grab them now to progress to the next level.
The tips on pushups are included in the compilation that I linked above.
Ditto for Squat 101 – the Reader!
(Tips here on their lonesome).
PS #2- Lots of you are buying audiobooks and that’s great! But remember, they don’t replace the digital or preferably physical books.
You need to SEE the exercises being performed. Not merely hear them (unless you’re buying audiobooks for background music to listen to while driving which a lot do, ain’t nothing wrong with that).
Fitness wise though, they’re the icing on the cake. NOT the cake itself!
Price shopping isn’t gonna cut it. “the audiobooks are cheaper so…”.
You need the digital or physical books MORE than the audiobooks if you’re truly buying them for fitness.
One caveat – my motivational books such as Zero to Hero!, Gumption Galore etc. Or other manuals … You CAN function and get by in that regard just fine with the audiobooks – but the digital or physical books still help.
But fitness wise, what I said above stands.
Ok, that’s that. Damn that was long again. Hehe.
(To apply for personal coaching (be warned in advance – it ain’t cheap – apply here).
(And fill out the forms fully, accurately, honestly. No, doing that doesn’t guarantee acceptance but it does put you head and fucking shoulders above the majority to start with).