One of the pet peeves I have – something that annoys me so much that I should probably label it on par with (and sometimes above) folks playing the fool when I’m working out.
What is it?
Well – this – people not GETTING back to me when I ask them something (and amazingly enough, this is looked upon as NORMAL in today’s dumbphone’s obsessed world).
Apparently it’s “kosher” these days to spend every waking minute updating one’s Facebook and other “streams” with meaningless, mindless and profoundly moronic “vicarious” selfies – but get back on an actual message?
Even better, post – or respond at length – to something that requires rational, conscious, and intelligent THOUGHT?
The most common excuse we hear for this is the same as we hear in terms of fitness – that being a sorry ass “I don’t have time to get back” (this despite dumbphones making it easy to get back within the blink of an eye if one really chooses).
Most of the people who say this really mean “I could care less about getting back to you”. Sadly, this list of people sometimes extends to friends as well who seem to take relationships (and great ones at that) for granted, never stopping once to think that relationships, like anything else, need constant nurturing or else they stop “blossoming”.
Some folks are slightly more “smart” about how they word their responses on this given what I said above.
“Oh, I’m unplugging from said devices”
“Oh, just give me a call if it’s something important”
Uh … and what if it’s not something earth shatteringly important that requires a phone call? What if you could simply type out a simple textual answer to what was being asked?
“Uhhhh … ” No answer.
Now, to be fair today’s social media obsessed world does mean that we all have multiple “conversations” vying for our attention. Something which is the complete opposite of what I state in Zero to Hero, and most of my other courses – that being to FOCUS upon ONE THING AT A TIME.
Despite what the plethora of “gurus” out there tell you, multi-tasking is without exception, for the most part, one of the biggest productivity – and ACHIEVEMENT – killers out there.
Following on from what I said above, some folks come up with the sorry ass excuses of “I’ve got 40 messages to deal with. Man, how can I ever keep up!”
And believe you me, if it’s a message that gives them some immediate benefit – or some immediate quick fix – these people are the QUICKEST to jump upon it despite the so called 40 other messages vying for their attention.
Now, why does this annoy me no end?
Well, because I’ve had more than one relationship (I’m talking friendly relationships – between buddies) go nowhere in general after said people suddenly decided to stop nurturing the relationship with the aforementioned excuses.
Now, you might think there were some problems brewing which caused this – but no. Amazingly enough, these same people when you meet them in person hold NO grudge towards you – and have NO issues with you – and yet, they won’t get back on anything in any sort of timely manner.
It’s the “run after me” syndrome they’re subconsciously displaying – something you do NOT want to display with close friends and family for one.
Sure, if it’s something or someone you don’t care about – by all means don’t invest time and energy into following up.
But if it’s a friend – a relationship you “believe” you care about – then sift past all the B.S. on the smartphone, and choose the messages that are important to you. Give them – and your TRUE friends – the attention they deserve, my friend.
You’ll be all the better off for it. I guarantee you this.
Personally speaking I’m down to less than 100 contacts on my WeChat list – and at one point it was literally down to about 19 – and I’d classify less than five of those as real friends.
But those “less than 5” are the people I CARE about. The people I choose to spend time with. The people that motivate. The people that uplift. The people, that in short – CARE.
Until, of course, they as well fall prey to the ever expanding “I’m too busy to get back” syndrome.
This recently happened to me and a good friend of mine – a guy I rated VERY highly indeed – a guy whose been into physical training his ENTIRE life.
When I first met him there was this “buzz” about him that attracted me to him and vice versa, and we hit it off from the word go and had many enjoyable conversations, brews together etc etc.
And today, that same person falls into the category of folks I no longer want to invest any time in – if just because his attitude towards the relationship in general frustrates me no end.
Does that mean I hate him? Not an iota. Wish him harm? NOT an iota. Stopped respecting the guy for his numerous accomplishments? Not a chance in hell. It’s simply something that has sadly stopped to blossom – and I’m accepting it – with an open heart and choosing to move on.
Funnily enough this downward spiral started a month or so after the dude stopped actively exercising (he was into bodyweight stuff himself). Now it’s all about “I don’t have time”, or “I’m not in the kind of shape to do that”, and so forth.
Ugggggggggghhhhhhhhh. ‘Tis indeed sad to see an inspiring figure turn into a pale and sorry imitation of his glory days – and all when it does NOT have to be that way!
Moral of the story?
Make time for those you love – and care about. Treat with the respect they deserve, and allott some time out of your day exclusively for these people.
You’ll be all the better off for it – that I DO guarantee you.
P.S. – If your “buzz” (translation – vibes) are DOWN, DOWN, and DOWN in a big way, physical activity will help ’em get back to the levels I stated. And pushups, my friend – including the “very best darn exercise there is” are the NUMERO UNO way amongst all the other bodyweight exercises out there for getting your vibe levels back up – and QUICKLY. Learn how to do so right here – – http://0excusesfitness.com/0excusesfitnessystem/