Pull-ups: The GREAT equalizer

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If there ever was an exercise that UNIFIES like nothing else, my friend, it’s the pull-up – the almighty holy grail of bodyweight exercise – the pull-up.

EVERYONE wants to do pull-ups.

The boobybuilders )if they can) and REAL men both wanna do ’em.

The weightlifters (again, if they CAN) – and bodyweight exercise enthusiasts, Crossfitters, strongmen, everyone agrees that the pull-up is a superlative exercise bar NONE.

Unlike the pushup, which the idiots and morons complain about being “just pushups” – you never hear any such dissent on the pull-up.

way back in the day, when I was a “straggly one” (or perhaps I was starting to get fat, I dont know) in college, a guy “Nikhil” once came to my house for a beer drinking session.

That was fine except he showed up an hour ahead of time.

I was doing pushups. Girlfriend was watching TV (her of the pink dumbbells).

He showed up with a friend.

And saw me doing pushups, and grinned.

“I’ll be back soon!”

And later that night, he asked me how many I could do.

“50” I replied. “At one shot”.

“That is great!” he said (this guy couldn’t do many at all).

“But someone that can pound out 50 pull-ups at one shot – now THAT guy … “

His voice trailed off.

I agreed!

Then we spoke about a martial artist fellow student who did 50 of ’em on his fingertips all day long. (pushups)

Real strength!

And then of course the idiots that say “it’s just pushups”.

But this is about the pullup eh.

And back to pull-ups – you dont see or hear of any such polarization there.

When you’re standing out there with a gaggle of guys shooting the bull – lets say in front of a chinning bar – either thick or normal – and another dude – lets say me – walks past and starts slinking out pull-ups easy peasy, lemon squeezy, then how do the rest of the guys who have been shooting the bull about “boobybuilding” feel?

“Solid character”, they go.

You can either slink ’em out – or you can’t.

The studs love to be called studs at pull-ups, because in most cases they worked their asses off to get to that level.

And the duds and cuck Schofield’s all WANT to be stud’s at pull-ups, or studs in general.

In the 1987 movie Over the Top, Sly Stallone is an arm wrassler that drives mammoth trucks for a living, and is looking to win the Arm Wrestling tourney in Vegas (the prize is another massive truck – this one shiny and gleaming as opposed to his beat down one).

Sly drives trucks for a living, sure.

But when it’s time to go to “work”, as he says – he means arm wrassling!

When that TABLE appears in front of him, and a competing ARM, Sly changes from the friendliest person you could imagine to a MACHINE .

A BEAST.

BEfore the damn match starts!

He focuses intensely, and then “twists his hat” back.

And he enters the ZONE – and wins.

“When I turn my hat around, I feel invincible. I feel like another person. I feel like … I dont know…”

He points to the truck behind him (the prize).

“Like a TRUCK!”

Ready to run ROUGHSHOD Over any and all opposition.

A lot of the nutjobs in China that pound boobies and do ESL claim their “real jobs” are something else.

No prizes for guessing which Bozo we’re referring to here, and his cronies (and there are many).

Much like the broke ass life coaches you see out there that “are always doing something else just to pay the bills” – “faking it until you make it” – and pretending to be someone you’re not. These two things annoy the ever living Bejesus out of me.

Like dude, if you’re in China, if you’re teaching ESL, then just say it for frigging Christ’s sake.

At least you’re being HONEST about it.

Of course, how dare I.

Bozo Schofield for one claims he was a “charity worker in China”.

Charity my ass.

Mother Teresa, move over – here comes the BOZO!

Same thing for a lot of the so called dumbass “China business experts” who claim to “be the one stop choice for sourcing stuff from China” when in reality they know squat all about it.

(Thats another great line from Over the Top– here comes Mike!) (when his young kid was learning how to drive trucks – do REAL things – like I try and teach my daughter when I can – such as FIGHTING in REAL LIFE for one (when I can)).

(as opposed to all the other rot these kids are constantly being fed with about “physical not being necessary”)

(remember nutjob in China who showed up and asked me “why I was working my body and not my brain” when I was doing pull-ups)?

Anyway . . .

But Sly really HAD a real job, and he proved it.

And when you see a chinning bar in front of you, THAT is how it is.

All else ceases to matter, bro.

You can’t fake it till you make it when it comes to pull-ups.

You can either walk up, chalk up (if you so choose) and knock ’em out.

Or, you can be the goggling onlooker.

You can either DO ’em – or you DON’T.

You’re either STRONG- or you AREN’T.

It’s that simple, bro.

As an aside, another funny example is the government owned liqor stores they have in many parts of the world.

Yes, the concept of “convenience” stores hasn’t quite caught on, and grabbing a beer from the next door store isn’t quite as easy as you might think in some countries.

Venezuela. India in the Northern Part of the country (curiously enough, India, despite not being a Commie dictatorship has many of the same issues that these Commie countries do) and many others …

Come evening time or nighttime, you’ll see LONG lines and THRONGS of people literally BATTLING to get their grog, usually handed to them through “iron bars”, much like prisoners clamoring for their meal.

Regardless of how rich or poor you are, unless you get someone to do the slumming for you, the “thekas” (Northern India term) are another one of those “great equalizers” cutting across class and strata divides like NOTHING else.

And one of the most annoying things on the planet as well.

Ugh.

China, despite being a bonafide Communist country has no such issues.

Thats what is funny bout China – in actuality, in daily life, consumers have WAY more choice and live WAY more normally than you’d expect!

In China, all it takes is a quick call to the store next to you and they are open 24/7/365.

Within 10 minutes, guys (sometimes cute gals) show up with massive crates of beer – or “cases”, depending upon, and you’re SET.

Now we’re talking!

Another great equalizer in a good way. LOL.

But anyway, point of this diatribe, which has rambled on for way longer than Id like is this.

Is that as a great customer recently said about the book on pushups “Buy this book. The Bodyweight Exercise GURU is WAITING For you!”

Well, he’s right in a way.

Im not exactly losing sleep over how many people buy it or don’t, but waiting for you behind them iron bars I AM, my friend.