It aint my first rodeo despite never having “been” to one
- Dawg...

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For five years of my life, I lived in the Deep South in one of the states that till this date gets a bad rap for racism, and never once – well, other than the time a motherfucker almost ran me over walking back home from school, but I’ve got a feeling dude was drunk, other than when a building superintendent bitched up a storm about Rueben and me swimming in the pool next to a friend’s apartment (technically he was right, but I remember Lilly fuming “he wouldna said nothing if two white boys were here” – Rueben was white btw) … and other than when some idiot stopped me, fire in his red eyes – short stocky SOB that said I was a fucking Afghan and needed to leave, and though Lilly, again present then “got the red ass”, it was all I could do to stop laughing, because he kept telling me dont stare at me, I’ll knock your damn lights out, and I kept waiting for him to do it, he never did, took off to the damn gym where a campus cop *Rueben again – good guy* gave him a dressing down later…

They said I could press charges if I wanted to. I dont know if they’d have given me all that info if it was just me.

I do remember them stopping me once late at night asking me for ID “because”.

I showed them mine, he shook my hand, I went on my damn way.

Luckily I didnt have beer in my bookbag at that time – hehe. I still remember walking across campus toting those damn beers to the dorm like my friend Aaron did …

Then the one time I was arbitrarily stopped “because some Hispanic guy had committed a crime”.

I remember all the black dudes gathering, looking at what was going AWN … Hehe.

10 minutes later, cop says “alright Sir, you’re free to go”.

OK … I could have bitched up a storm, but these coppers try and do a good job at the end of the day, things are what they are my friend.

Anyway – bitch all you like in a similar situation. Scream civil rights violating motherfuckers if you want, defund the police then watch crime fuckin spiral (loons) … your choice.

I simply remember living five plus years in the damn south, having nothing but fond memories, especially the food – not that NY was bad in that regard either. Hehe.

But Southern style soul food, there’s something to it.

Anyway, off the cuff,

I’ve never been to a country music concert. Tho I did make it to Memphis!

Or, a live rap show. Hehe.

I’ve never been to an actual rodeo, strange as dat might sound …

Or, Dolly Pardon’s amusement park…

I’ve never actually eaten chitlins, the smell frying – dang, it was enough to make me SCOOT out of the house where I was at that time …

And lets see, what else…

I wasn’t big on watermelon down south, hehe.

I am these days!

And probably a host of other damn things I ain’t done that most Southerners have, or a lot have (including kill my own meat regularly).

Or hunt game … I’ve always been kinda ambivalent about that!

I dont think it should be done away with it, yet, a balance is needed.


I have done a shitton of thangs you hear a lot of southerners do, including eat a lot at cracker barrel, and dem all you can eat “Barrrnnnnnnnnhill Buffets” down there…

Waffle house and such.

I didnt ever get into the habit of yee hawing either.

or saying ole “Mac” donald. Hehe.



When life throws you a curveball, most people DUCK and play dodgeball.

Thats why you hear all the bitchin everywhere these days. Folks need to get tough physically and mentally.

Me, hell, no matter what it is, my first answer always is.

“It aint my first rodeo”

Thats the confidence a sink or swim live by attitude gives you, my friend, and learning in the trenches.

And thats the spirit outlined in Zero to HERO! And Gumption Galore. 

And as I tell my little girl why I bought my damn a/C right now in the first place years back in China when I didnt even need it…

That look of joy on your face when you were 4…

And that made it all worth it, and I Remember my wife cattily saying “every time she wants something, it makes its way here right quick!”

There’s lessons to all of this. See if you can spot ’em.


Rahul Mookerjee (Edit – or driven a  damn RV … Hehe) ( I do want to someday!)

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