Warning: Undefined array key "inject_bottom_color" in /home/0excusesfitness/public_html/wp-content/plugins/newsletter-leads/plugin.php on line 143

Warning: Undefined array key "inject_bottom_color" in /home/0excusesfitness/public_html/wp-content/plugins/newsletter-leads/plugin.php on line 159

Warning: Undefined array key "" in /home/0excusesfitness/public_html/wp-content/plugins/newsletter-leads/plugin.php on line 159

Warning: Trying to access array offset on value of type null in /home/0excusesfitness/public_html/wp-content/plugins/newsletter-leads/plugin.php on line 160

Warning: Trying to access array offset on value of type null in /home/0excusesfitness/public_html/wp-content/plugins/newsletter-leads/plugin.php on line 161

Friend,

A long time ago, I worked a very crappy job indeed in the Middle East, which of course due to a) an amalgamtion of circumstances (no, I did not create those!) and b) my own doings (after a), I figured, phock, why not) I did all I could to get canned from.

Eventually, I succeeded. Hehe.

But that job was a total crap job, in fact, it was one of those jobs in the Middle East where apparently “everyone from India was a “menial worker”” and the Arabs were entitled as phock (dont know if that still happens, probably to a degree?) – and of course, the company heads were Indians, but they pandered to the Arabs in the same degree.

I still remember one person telling me when I brought goose and gander up.

“It’s their country! They can do it, we can’t!”

Huh??

Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME, dude?

Like, lets take the U.S.

Do Americans – or anyone – doing a shoddy job or not at all get away “Its America, so we can!”

Bullshit!

It’s about pandering. Bottom line. Plain and fuckin simple!

And of course these days back Stateside, good ole (not) Hiden “creepy Joe” biden has made sure that illegal immigrants and criminals have MORE rights than legal folks.

I shit you NOT. Just look at what is happening on the borders there – and in many places!

But anyway …

Ahmed was one of those guys who whether he knows it or not (probably not) – was a perfect example of NATURAL MARKETING!

He was just … well, I’ll give you an example.

He was the backslapping, beer drinking type (yes, despite the hoo haa about liqor being illegal in the Middle East without permits and crap, and Muslims not drinking – guess what. EVERYONE DOES).

Ugh, that bootleg I once drank!

Anyway, he was that sort.

He was working IT with me – they called us “technicians” instead of engineers. LOL.

You might get pissed reading this, but as I’ve said before, that company, everyone laughed at everyone, so …

But anyway, a huge black bag showed up with one day with servers or some shit.

It was unpacked.

Then I saw Ahmed at the back of the room.

A rustling noise was coming.

And I looked back, and here was Ahmed, about as tall as me (not quite as phat as I was back then, hehe, but hey – I still had the GRIP! As Ahmed said “he’s very STRONG!” – when they tried to grip my hand, and he did, I gave him the GORILLA!) … trying to wriggle his way into the black bag.

On a whim.

PIcture this, a full grown adult trying to wriggle into a garbage bag and you’ve got an idea how comic it was – now add the Arab robes (bedouin, or whatever it’s called)in, and you’ve got the IDEA!

It was hilarious. We laughed up a storm.

Dish-dash-a I believe not bedouin?? I dont know, Abaya? I dont know, can’t remember, but those words … ah yes.

Abaya was that sexy thing women wear, with gleaming eyes showing, and plenty of unhidden LUST  in many cases. Dishdasha, the men …

(can’t quite recall what Bedouin means, hehe).

Anyway, I loved the Balochs there. 

GRESAT PEOPLE ALL OF THEM!!!!

And more INdian than yours truly, hehe, ever could be!

We love India, they kept saying. They DID, right down to BOllywood (they hate Pakistan with a fervor and passion).

Hamidullah, in case a certain “Farooq” is reading this. What a great guy he was, solid character!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YES SIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, Ahmed.

One afternoon I walked into work after lunch (Ahmed sat in front of me).

I fully expected to find him sleeping or something.

Instead, there he was, watching sloshy porn with headphones on, and not bothering who was looking. Hehe.

Of course he didnt care.

The company pandered to them to such a great extent that he was impossible to fire (dont know about NOW, but back then thats how it was).

And with all the whiny nonsense coming in about “calling women women and not chicks” , I wonder what the great, hehe, Ahmed would have said.

(Hey, he was a good guy actually. Just brutal, not so much as me, but similar!)

“Call them bitches” would have been his response.

ask him. LOL!

Funnily enough, women seem to get away with calling each other bitches all the time, rating each other tits and what not, yet, a man does it, it’s wrong?

When women talk about you know what sizes, is it big (like I keep getting asked “I want to see your big wang”) or if it’s teeny Bozo flapping in a teenier breeze … its OK.

When men do it, its wrong?

GET THE FUCK REAL, guys!

GOOSE AND GANDER!

Anyway, Ahmed was nothing if not brutally honest.

He once calle dme an “fucking” A hole for not showing up to work on Saturday, or not wanting to, hehe.

That I am!

He also shook my hand when he got a better job!

“Friends foreever”, I remember him saying.

Thats my man. My  (sandy, hehe) nikka!

Not a Bozo like “Manny from Philippines” who bears grudges for years. Like Uncle Bob said, drunken argument, get over it ALREADY.

He never did, of course.

Anyway, where am I going with all this.

I dont know.

I was going to give yo u another Ahmed special.

Ah yes.

Here it is!

After lunch, his “supervisor” (of sorts, apparently), an INdian dude questioned him meekly about work (it seemed like the other way around i.e. he was the boss Ahmed, and supervisor was the supervised. “because he was Indian” or some BS. Phock that. yet another reason I LEFT!

ABILITY, folks, not BS!)

he replied with some inanity.

And then, apparently the water was out in the bathrooms or something and he complained to “Anupam” (India dude) about it.

Anupam shrugged his shoulders, like “wtf can I do”.

True, lol. /

Ahmed –

“But then how we wash our hands after we go poo poo !”

Trust me, this guy was a character!

Bozo would love him, hehe, except Ahmed would probably whoop his ass big time!

Anyway where am I going with allt his again.

I dont know …

Except to say this, be a real man, friend.

And TRAIN real man style.

Get your pre-order in for the best damn course in “dat” regard right now, hehe.

Lumberjack “Lodestone” Fitness. 

Best,

Rahul Mookerjee

And really, friend.

I’ve got weary of asking you so please dont make me ask again.

Get the Collector’s Edition of Fast and Furious Fitness, only TWO COPIES lying around – the rest all sold like hotcakes, now these two, they’re sitting around.

I love the book.

But it needs go NOW – to YOU!

Grab this now, friend, and those that do within the next hours – you’ll get a special offer in your Inbox!

PPS – What to call them?

Well, In China, I call them ladies.

“How dare you! We’re not old!”

Chuckles.

Then I call them “girls”.

“Were ladies!”

Then I ask them what to call ’em.

They giggle.

Hey.

What can I SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LAdies, we love YOU!

Bad Boys forever, hehe. REAL BAD BOYS!

Then you have those that ask “if you’re married”.

You say no.

“why you not married!”

OK, so I am.

“Why you talking to me!” (she’ll never ask why she’s talking to YOU, hehe).

I swear. It’s just hilarious, folks, and yours truly brings it ALL TO YOU!